


Business Relations

by benguiat



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mobfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Mobswap (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Mobtale (Undertale), Arranged Marriage, Babybones (Undertale), Mafia AU, Mob AU, Onshot, Spiceyhoney - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-12
Updated: 2020-09-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:13:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26429200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/benguiat/pseuds/benguiat
Summary: Edge is no babybones, he's eight years old! More than old enough to tag along with his brother Red for a business meeting. A meeting with Don Sapphire, one of the most powerful dons in the city!Neither Edge nor Red know Sapphire will have more than just a business proposal.~mafia au with a hint of babybones spiceyhoney
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	Business Relations

**Author's Note:**

> Some mafia au with a hint of babybones spiceyhoney and a dash of arranged marriage uwu
> 
> i don't have any notes other than underswap grillby has no personality in this and im sorry i hope you enjoy everything else tho ;v;

“alright, brat, remember- this is a learnin’ experience, got it?”

“I thought everything was a learning experience?”

“heh. well, yeah, but this is a _planned_ one, for once.”

Red offered his hand as he opened the car door and helped his sibling down onto the ground. Not that Edge _needed_ help climbing out, but if it made Red feel better, then he’d allow it. Especially since this was the first time they were going to a business meeting together (Edge’s first one!) and he’d agreed to listen to whatever his big brother said so that it went smoothly.

“now, this should be an easy meeting- Sapphire’s one of the most powerful dons in the city,” Red explained, keeping firm his grip on Edge’s hand as they started towards the front doors of the inconspicuous house. “but he's also a monster, and monsters usually protect their own. capiche?”

“Capiche!” Edge parroted, then chastised himself for such childish excitement. It had no place here, learning about the family business he’d be a part of someday.

But… this was so exciting!

“good. so, with a monster you're _usually_ safe, but?...”

Edge cleared his throat, hoping to sound more serious as he answered. “But keep your guard up anyway.”

“good. now, Sapphire’s real influential, and he'd be useful as a partner. just follow my lead. he probably won’t bother ya, but _if_ he does-“

“Just don’t make him mad.”

“pretty much. now-“

“I’ve got it, let’s shake a leg!”

Edge reached out for the doorbell and rang it before Red could stop him, and even though it earned him a stern look, his big brother couldn’t do much in the way of scolding before the doors were opened up by a butler, or some other kind of servant.

They were a fire elemental monster made up of swirling yellow flames. They peered at the siblings through warped glasses and offered a smile with their gaping mouth.

“Welcome, Mr. Gaster, we’ve been expecting you. My name is Bea, please let me know if there is anything I can do for you to make your visit more comfortable. Ah,” their gaze fell upon Edge after their rehearsed greeting, their tone lighting into something more sincere and charmed, “another guest we were not expecting!”

“hope it won’t be an issue,” Red said politely, trying to diffuse a worst case scenario he was already anticipating. “Edge won’t be no trouble- kid’s just here to get a feel for the business.”

“Aha. I don’t know that Sapphire would want to involve a child in his business. Little one, would you rather I escort you to some more age-appropriate activities while the adults settle their business?”

“No!” Edge immediately refused, quickly putting Red between himself and Bea. Red gave him a gentle nudge, and he corrected himself to be more polite. “No _thank you,_ I’ll stay with my brother. I’m old to be with the adults! I'm nine years old!”

Red snorted. "eight."

"Eight going on nine!"

“Mm. I see. Very well,” the elemental relented, not losing the fond smile on their face as they ushered the skeletons inside. “I’ll show you to Sapphire’s office. Do you drink coffee, little one?”

Bea seemed to be much more interested in conversing with Edge than with Red, whether it be because they were humoring him, or because there weren't many children in this line of business, or because they simply liked kids. Either way it made Edge feel important, and put some pressure on him to drink a gross adult drink, even as his face scrunched up at the thought of the bitter stuff. Before he could force out a convincing answer, Bea saw the cringe on his face and chuckled.

“I see. I'm not a fan, either. Is tea more to your liking?”

“Um... Yes?”

“You know, I think I'd be able to whip up some chocolate milk, instead.”

Edge held back a relieved sigh and answered without hesitation- Red didn't let him have chocolate milk very often. “I suppose that would be fine!”

Bea made a sudden, sharp crackling noise that sounded a bit like a snort. “I hope I can prepare it to your liking.”

“Just don't hold back on the chocolate syrup!”

His big brother nudged him again. “ _Edge_.”

Edge nudged his brother back and huffed. “What! They said to let them know how to make me comfortable!”

“I did indeed,” Bea commented.

“well,” Red huffed, “y’could at least use your manners, bossy bones.”

“I’m not bossy!” Edge scoffed, insulted, and turned back to the fire elemental. “Only if you feel like it! Please and thank you!”

Bea chuckled again. “You’re welcome, bossy bones.”

Edge was about to make his disapproval of that teasing nickname very much known, when the butler rapped their knuckles against a set of doors and pushed them open, gesturing for the skeletons to step inside. Edge let Red lead them in, certainly not because he was suddenly nervous!

The room was a small study. To their right was a beckoning fireplace, two chairs sat cozily in front of it. To the left, a whole _wall_ full of bookshelves that Edge itched to go over and pick through. A record player in the corner played an unfamiliar tune, some lively jazz. And directly in front of them, an imposing desk by the window, a tall, wide chair’s back to them.

Edge thought it would have made an intimidating picture for the Don to be sat there, to slowly turn around and stare them down from the other side of the room. But he also knew better from Red's insistence he always watch for the finer details. Old cigar smoke, which hung heavy in the room, was thickest by the fireplace, rising up from an ashtray between the cozy chairs.

“Don. Red Gaster has arrived.”

“Come sit down, please,” Don Sapphire insisted, voice mellifluous and pleasing. They waved a surprisingly delicate looking hand towards the small table between the two chairs, gesturing towards a coffee tray. "Help yourself!”

Red led Edge over to the fireplace, and as they went Bea spoke up again, “I’ll go fetch another chair,” they gave a fond, comforting smile, “for the plus one.”

“Plus one?”

The music abruptly screeched to a stop.

Sapphire quickly stood and moved out from behind the chair before Red could start giving an explanation, and he instead went silent as blue magic gripped his and Edge’s SOULS. The don’s bones didn’t make up the same kind of the hulking monster Edge was anticipating, like his older brother, but that certainly didn’t make them any less intimidating.

He only came up to Red’s chest, and unlike Red he was thin as a twig- but what he lacked in mass he made up for in his confidence and his strong magic. His magic weighed heavily on Edge's SOUL, dunking his bones in cold _suspicion_ and _distrust._ Piercing blue magic in his eye sockets was narrowed to sharp, focused pinpricks, and the same magic was gathered, poised around his hands.

Yet, as soon as Edge had digested all this, the threatening aura around the Don melted into something much softer. The magic around him dissipated, his intent fading into nothing but very faint _surprise._ The don’s irises expanded passively, almost growing fuzzy in his eye sockets. It made all his soft features more prominent and less intimidating. His cheekbones were soft and chubby, his eye sockets large and round. His hands were only as large as Edge’s (who wasn’t even done growing!), the bones themselves thin and dainty.

Though he didn’t seem as much a threat as he was before, Edge ducked under Red’s arm as soon as he found he could move again. From behind his big brother, Edge looked the don over completely, his eyes catching on his outfit. The Don on was wearing a beautiful evening dress, hanging off his shoulders and hips to frame his bones loosely. The contrast of the fabric’s peach color, his pearly bones, and his blue magic looked lovely. Shiny beads were sewn into the bodice and the hem, sparkling when he shifted.

“Oh,” Don Sapphire blurted, meeting Edge’s eyes and staring dumbly for a moment, “Plus one. I see.” There was an awkward pause for a moment before he cleared his throat and flicked a wrist. The record in the corner began playing again, breaking the silence and relieving some of the tension. The don’s expression relaxed into an apologetic smile. “So sorry about my little outburst! I’m sure you can understand that I have to be cautious! Mister Gaster, I didn’t know you had a child! My invitation would have gladly been extended to them as well if you had only let me know!"

“... uh, my brother.” The sweat collected on Red’s skull gave away his stoic facade. He quickly began giving his own apologies. “real sorry for surprisin' ya, i should have asked-”

“I’m not upset,” The don insisted, waving a hand dismissively as he turned to the smallest skeleton in the room. “And I owe you an apology, as well! So sorry, I feel terrible for scaring you!”

“... wasn’t scared,” Edge muttered into their brother’s coat sleeve, still clinging to Red’s arm. 

Sapphire smiled, and his eye sockets even crinkled fondly. “Oh, of course not! I can see you’re no babybones. What’s your name?”

“introduce yourself, kid,” Red prompted, gently nudging his brother forward.

“Edge,” he mumbled, offering his hand, which Sapphire took and shook gently. Despite having rehearsed introductions with Red several times before this, for some reason he instead blurted the first thing that came to mind. “I really like your dress.”

“Oh, why, thank you! You have good taste! I like your jacket! Although, it doesn’t seem like it suits someone with your keen sense of style?”

“U-Um, yes... but, my brother says dresses aren’t intimidating. And, um, it's good to be intimidating, ‘specially around humans...”

“Ah- I see,” Sapphire nodded, looking thoroughly amused. “Well, that might be true, being intimidating has its uses. But the element of surprise does, too!”

“Surprise?”

“When you let your opponent underestimate you!" Sapphire explained, leaning in as if he was relaying an important secret. "Act like the cute, delicate little flower they think you are so they don't see it coming when you stab them in the back! True, they probably won't even bother with you in the first place if they’re already afraid of you,” he shrugged, “but nothing will give you a better advantage than the enemy thinking you're harmless.”

…Woah.

Edge hadn't even thought of it like that before! Make the enemy think you were no threat, then pull the rug out from under them!

“Besides, it's much more fun that way!” the don chuckled, a mischievous spark in his eye sockets, “Trust me. Nothing scares a human more than someone in a cute dress who's richer than them, more powerful than them, and who can beat the shit out of them!”

“Wow,” Edge exclaimed, awed, “I'm learning so much already!”

“i'm glad,” Red huffed, still looking a bit nervous as he set a hand on the Edge’s shoulder. “i'm just starting to teach the kid about the family business, hoped you wouldn't mind if i brought’em along to sit in on our meeting.”

“Oh, of course!” Sapphire exclaimed, waving Bea over to set down the extra chair they'd retrieved by the other two in front of the fire. “I'm happy to have him here!”

Red patted Edge’s shoulder to prompt him to reply, though he didn't really need to. “Thank you, sir!”

“Oh, no need to be so formal, Edge! You can just call me Sapphire.”

Just Sapphire! Edge grinned up at his big brother, who despite still sweating anxiously, looked pleased and nodded encouragingly.

The actual meeting itself, Edge thought they understood well enough. He learned Sapphire was taking advantage of the alcohol business now that the substance had been made illegal. Humans and monsters alike were apparently desperate to get their hands on it and would pay anything for the “good stuff.” But it was risky business, of course, it _was_ illegal, and there was plenty of competition with other gangs in the business that often led to confrontation. Which was where an alliance with a weapons dealer like Red would be useful. Sapphire wanted good guns for his workers without magic, and if Red agreed, experienced gunmen to train them.

Red asked about payment. Sapphire threw out a number as a suggestion.

Red countered with a suggestion of his own, saying the offer seemed a bit too low. Sapphire insisted he didn't want to pay too much for a one-time job.

Red suggested supplying experienced armed men, rather than just arms for men who didn't know how to use them, and to either be paid per every job they worked. Sapphire seemed content enough with the idea, and offered a steady percentage of his profits every week, with the exact number being subject to change for the hours worked and monsters working.

Edge listened attentively as he sipped his chocolate milk, silently observing the exchange, before Sapphire turned his attention to him.

“Have you been paying attention?”

“Mm-hm,” Edge hummed. “Yes, Sapphire!”

“Good! I think we're through with business talk. I think we’ll engage in some small-talk now."

Despite knowing he had to be on his best behavior, Edge couldn't hold back the enormous sigh he let out as he slumped in his chair. He prepared to zone out indefinitely until the boring adult conversation had finished. Predictably, his big brother scolded him.

 _"Edge!"_ Red snapped, looking embarrassed, "ya know better than to be rude like that! apologize."

Before Edge could do as he was told, Sapphire cut him off with a laugh. "Oh, don't worry, that's just how children are! You know, if you'd rather not stick around for small-talk, I have a little brother about your age you could play with while we finish up here."

"Really?" Edge perked up, sitting up excitedly. Most of his time was spent with his brother or with his bodyguards, and his brother was too busy to properly vet potential friends- he never got to play with other kids! 

"huh," Red mumbled suspiciously, "didn't know ya had a brother..."

"That's how I prefer it," Sapphire snapped. Edge snickered at his brother's put-out expression. "Anyways! I'm sure he'd love a little playmate! Why don't you two go play for a bit?"

"Yeah! Yes please!" Edge exclaimed happily. Usually he would have asked for Red's permission, but he didn't think he needed it when they were with Sapphire and his brother was so concerned about pleasing the don.

"Wonderful! Bea, have Edge join Honey in the playroom!"

Edge excitedly hopped out of his seat and ran to the door where Bea was waiting. Red called after him, still sounding nervous and uncertain. “hey, play nice, brat!”

“I will!” Edge replied, not sparing his brother a second glance before leaving the study with the butler.

"What is Sapphire’s brother's name?"

“Honey.”

“What’s Honey like?”

"Hmm. Well, a lot like you."

"Oh! Really?"

"Yes! Short, boney."

"Well I _know_ we're both skeletons! I meant if he's nice! Or his favorite school subject!"

"He doesn't go to school. He is privately tutored."

"Well, me too, but you know what I mean. What does he like to learn about? I like puzzles!"

"You can ask him yourself, little boss."

Edge didn't get a chance to insist that he certainly was not bossy. Bea stopped in front of an unremarkable door next to the study's. The butler took out a ring of keys and began shuffling through them until they found what they were looking for and started to unlock the door.

Edge thought that was… strange. "Um? Why is the door locked?..."

"He's made a few too many successful escape attempts," Bea chuckled. "He's made his way out of the house and into town several times. We only keep him on lockdown when there’s nobody to keep an eye on him, so we don't have to chase him down later. He’s quite the slippery snail."

"Oh! Impressive!" That made sense! Sometimes Edge himself got a little antsy and wanted to get away from the constant supervision from his brother and bodyguards. He'd never been successful though! “Maybe he can teach me!”

“Don’t encourage him.”

Bea swung the door open, and Edge peeked out around the butler to see a skeleton his age sheepishly backing away from the doorframe. The kid had hollow sockets and yellow-gold freckles dotting his cheekbones. He wore fancy-looking knickers paired with a dress shirt and suspenders, but to Edge’s dismay the collar was loosened and suspenders hanging off the kid’s hips distastefully, the entire ensemble looking disheveled. What a waste of such nice clothes.

“What are you up to now, Honey?” Bea questioned, eyes narrowed scrutinizingly. “What’ve you got?”

“nothin’,” Honey answered much too quickly to sound genuine, hands flying behind his back. Not exactly subtle.

“Alright, jig’s up, give it here.”

“dunno what you’re talkin’ about.”

Bea shot Honey a very no-nonsense look, holding out a hand expectantly. The kid wilted, giving up and grudgingly handing over a rusty old nail and busted up screwdriver. “Don’t tell me you’re learning to pick locks.”

“i would if somebody weren’t a snitch,” the kid mumbled.

“I see you’re in one of your moods… Well, I have a surprise for you- it might help your attitude.”

“doubt it. what is it, a new outfit? new toy? new-” Honey looked over and finally noticed Edge. “uh. that’s a kid.”

“Yes, hi! My name is Edge!” Edge waved.

Honey didn’t reply, looking unsettled. “... did Sapph kidnap some kid for me?”

 _“No,_ your brother did not _kidnap_ him,” Bea sighed exasperatedly. “Edge here is the brother of one of Sapphire’s business partners. He thought you two would get along nicely while the adults talk. Now, you two have fun. I’ll make you some lunch.”

Bea abruptly left and closed the door behind him, followed by the distinct clinks of the door being locked once more, and leaving the children alone. And now that there weren’t any adults nearby, Edge remembered that he’d never really spoken to another kid before, and had no idea what to say.

Apparently neither did Honey, because the both spent a good minute just staring at each other before Honey finally spoke up, looking down at the floor as he kicked aside a stray marble. “...i coulda gotten that lock if i’d had another minute. bea’s such a spoilsport…”

Oh! Now Edge knew what to say! “I can teach you how to lockpick!”

At that, the other child scoffed. “how? bea took our only tools.”

He dug into his jacket pocket and pulled out his lockpicking kit with a flourish. “Ta-da! My brother says to always carry it in case of emergencies!”

“woah.” Honey smiled wide, a mischievous look in his eye. “won’t your brother be mad? it’s not really an emergency.”

“Sure it is! Umm… I need to go outside for some fresh air! Urgently!”

“oh, yes, of course. and i think i urgently need some ice cream, and there happens to be a parlor in town…”

“Oh! Oh.” Edge bounced on the balls of his feet excitedly before patting at his empty pockets. His shoulders sagged. “Oh… I don’t have any money. But, we could still get some fresh air?...”

Without replying, Honey bolted off to the toy chest in the corner of the room and began rooting through it. He returned triumphantly with a piggy bank. “ta-da. now show me how to pick that lock, and i’ll introduce you to the art of misdirection.”

\---

Red sat in an awkward silence with Sapphire _,_ who was currently pouring himself a second cup of coffee and fishing out two cigars from an excessively decorated wooden box. The over-familiarity and friendliness Sapphire was exuding was unprofessional, and nothing that Red had expected. It did more to unsettle him than relax him. 

He still took the offered cigar, though.

“Your little brother...” Sapphire hummed, blowing out a puff of smoke, “I think he has potential!”

Sapphire was showing much more interest in Edge than Red thought he would. He didn’t know if it was a good or bad thing, but either way he wasn’t comforted by it. He replied with the cigar between his teeth. “thanks. he’s a fast learner.”

“I can see. He’s a very sweet boy, too!”

“yeah. he’s a good kid.” Red huffed a short chuckle. “a little too friendly. tryin’ to break him out of that.”

“Maybe not completely,” Sapphire suggested. “He’d make a lovely little gentleman someday!”

Okay, that was a little too weird for Red to let slide. He narrowed his eyes in a scrutinizing glare and growled lowly through his teeth. “that’s enough beatin’ around the bush. what’re ya getting at?”

Sapphire smiled, shrugging innocently. “I’m just saying he’d make a wonderful husband someday!”

 _“what the fuck,”_ Red blurted, cringing. “you-? he’s just a babybones!”

“Not for _me,_ genius,” Sapphire grumbled in exasperation, finally losing his smile to a frown. “For _my_ brother.”

“oh? oh.” Red cleared his throat in embarrassment. “s-so- what, ya want to arrange for Edge to marry yer little brother?"

"Is that so hard to believe?"

"i mean… kinda old-fashioned, isn’t it?"

"Maybe," Sapphire admitted, taking a long drag on his cigar. "But you know this business is lonely. I'm too busy- not to mention too paranoid- to even think about having a casual fling, much less find someone to go steady with. I would’ve preferred something arranged to nothing at all, you know? Just for the company! Don't know about _you,_ but I don't want the same for my little brother."

Truth be told, Red had never given much thought to pursuing a relationship. Maybe once or twice when he was a rebellious teen who didn't want to take part in the family business, but that had changed quickly when Edge had been born. Unlike Sapphire, Red hadn’t had a helpful butler to take care of his babybones brother for him. He'd raised Edge all on his own, and even now that he had bodyguards hired to keep an eye on the brat during his more hands-on business, he and Edge were still usually together. They'd been so inseparable for nearly the last decade Red didn't _have_ to yearn for any other company, let alone a romantic partner.

Still though, he thought about Edge. Red wasn't going to be there for the little guy forever, and he doubted Edge would _want_ him around forever. The kid was already fighting for as much independence as he could get. And Sapphire was right- their kind of business _was_ lonely. Red had no real friends to speak of. Edge had never had _any_ friends, and Red would've needed a real thick skull to miss the way his brother had leapt at the offer of a playmate just moments ago.

Sure, it was old fashioned to arrange marriages nowadays. And Red still felt iffy about choosing something as big as a future mate for his brother. But maybe it would be for the best in the long run. Red had had Edge for company his whole adult life, but Edge wasn't going to have a babybones keeping him occupied. Maybe he'd be better off with a mate to fall back on, and one who was already exposed to their business?

Thoroughly indecisive, Red downed the rest of his coffee and took several long drags of his cigar before speaking again. "i dunno. never given it any thought. pickin' out my brother’s mate for’im just feels nuts."

"That's putting it lightly," Sapphire chuckled. "But I’ve given it thought. A lot. And I feel like it'd be best for Honey in the long run. He might be upset for a while, but he'll understand where I'm coming from, eventually."

Red sighed, shaking his head. "i just dunno."

"You don't have to decide now," Sapphire insisted. "Just let the kids get to know each other! Bring Edge by once a week so they can have a little playdate. You can make a decision whenever you feel you're ready to."

"i'll _think_ about it,” Red conceded, putting emphasis on the fact that it wasn’t a definite yes. “just to give Edge a playmate, for now. kid could use a friend, anyways."

“That’s all I ask,” Sapphire said, mouth curling into a pleased smile. “I’m sure the kids’ll hit it off.”

Their conversation was interrupted by the faint sound of something shattering. Faint, but not enough to go unnoticed, especially by monsters who dealt in business like theirs. Both Red and Sapphire were on their feet in half a second, and peering into the hallway the next.

“the fuck was that?” Red hissed. “window?” 

“Couldn’t be,” Sapphire murmured back, “It didn’t sound like a window breaking…”

“yer right, sounded thicker, heavier... dishes? pottery, maybe?”

“Let’s check the kitchen. The boys will be safe in the playroom.”

\---

The two quickly left to investigate the kitchen on the other side of the house. Meanwhile, two babybones waited until the adults were out of earshot to sneak out of the playroom and out the front door, stifling their giggles.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments are much appreciated!
> 
> For this universe i like to think that Sapph and Red are both very protective big bros in very different ways. Red wants to make sure Edge knows everything he needs to know to survive and gives him all the tools necessary before sending him off into the big bad world. Sapph, on the other hand, wants to shelter Honey from the big bad world completely. He knows Honey feels stifled, and tries to spoil his bro with the fanciest toys and clothes, but Honey is very much over it.
> 
> Both Edge and Honey want time away from their overprotective brothers, and now that they have joined forces, NOTHING stands between them and the mischief they are DETERMINED to cause owo


End file.
